What sane person could live in this world and not be crazy?
--Ursula LeGuin
An idea that is not dangerous is unworthy of being called an idea at all.
--Oscar Wilde
If confusion is the first step to knowledge, I must be a genius.
--Larry Leissner
When I hear somebody sigh, "Life is hard," I am always tempted to ask, "Compared to what?"
--Sydney J. Harris
All I want is a warm bed, a kind word and unlimited power.
--Ashleigh Brilliant
Being defeated is often a temporary condition. Giving up is what makes it permanent.
--Marilyn vos Savant
Do not follow where the path may lead. Go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.
--Muriel Strode
Discovery is seeing what everybody else has seen, and thinking what nobody else has thought.
--Albert Szent-Gyorgi
Two roads diverged in a woods, and I— I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference.
--Robert Frost
Better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.
--Chinese Proverb
You miss 100 percent of the shots you never take.
--Wayne Gretzky
We should take care not to make intellect our god; it has, of course, powerful muscles, but no personality.
--Albert Einstein
Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls, and looks like work.
--Thomas Edison
The things we have to learn before we do them, we can learn by doing them.
--Aristotle
Most men occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of them pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing happened.
--Winston Churchill
The more sand that has escaped from the hourglass of our life, the clearer we should see through it.
--Jean-Paul Sartre
A woman is the only thing that I am afraid of that I know will not hurt me.
--Abraham Lincoln
Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.
--Napoleon Bonaparte
Does it look like I'm wearing a shirt made out of delicious candy? No!
If you are going through hell, keep going.
--Winston Churchill
God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.
--Voltaire
I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.
--Thomas Edison
Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.
--Mel Brooks
Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has not heart; and any man who is over 30, and is not a conservative,
has no brains.
--Winston Churchill
The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his.
--General George Patton
Inside me lives a skinny woman crying to get out. But I can usually shut her up with cookies.
--unknown
There is no sincerer love than the love of food.
--George Bernard Shaw
The covers of this book are too far apart.
--Ambrose Bierce
Too many pieces of music finish too long after the end.
--Igor Stravinsky
Anything that is too stupid to be spoken is sung.
--Voltaire
When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before.
--Mae West
I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to.
--Elvis Presley
Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you.
--Carl Gustav Jung
If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?
--Abraham Lincoln
Few things are harder to put up with than a good example.
--Mark Twain
Hell is other people.
--Jean-Paul Sartre
You can get more with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone.
--Al Capone
It is time I stepped aside for a less experienced and less able man.
--Professor Scott Elledge on his retirement from Cornell
Attention to health is life's greatest hindrance.
--Plato
Plato was a bore.
--Friedrich Nietzsche
Nietzsche was stupid and abnormal.
--Leo Tolstoy
I'm not going to get into the ring with Tolstoy.
--Ernest Hemingway
Hemingway was a jerk.
--Harold Robbins
I don't feel good.
--The last words of Luther Burbank
Nothing is wrong with California that a rise in the ocean level wouldn't cure.
--Ross MacDonald
I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
--Mark Twain
It is now possible for a flight attendant to get a pilot pregnant.
--Richard J. Ferris, president of United Airlines
I don't want to achieve immortality through my work; I want to achieve immortality through not dying.
--Woody Allen
Sanity is a madness put to good uses.
--George Santayana
Imitation is the sincerest form of television.
--Fred Allen
Copy from one, it's plagiarism; copy from two, it's research.
--Wilson Mizner
Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.
--T. S. Eliot
The longer I live the more I see that I am never wrong about anything, and that all the pains that I have so humbly taken
to verify my notions have only wasted my time.
--George Bernard Shaw
Silence is argument carried out by other means.
--Ernesto"Che"Guevara
Well done is better than well said.
--Benjamin Franklin
The average person thinks he isn't.
--Father Larry Lorenzoni
Sometimes it is not enough to our best; we must do what is required.
--Sir Winston Churchill
Ask her to wait a moment - I am almost done.
--Carl Friedrich Gauss, while working, when informed that his wife is dying
I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat!
--Will Rogers
If stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?
--Will Rogers
The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a 'C', the idea must be feasible.
--A Yale University management professor in response to student Fred Smith's paper proposing reliable overnight delivery
service (Smith went on to found Federal Express Corp.)
Everything that can be invented has been invented.
--Charles H. Duell, Commissioner, U.S. Office of Patents, 1899
Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.
--Mark Twain
Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something.
--last words of Pancho Villa
Now, now my good man, this is no time for making enemies.
--Voltaire on his deathbed in response to a priest asking that he renounce Satan.
I worship the quicksand he walks in.
--Art Buchwald
Wagner's music is better than it sounds.
--Mark Twain
We are not retreating - we are advancing in another Direction.
--General Douglas MacArthur
If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens?
--Seymour Cray, father of supercomputing
Your Highness, I have no need of this hypothesis.
--Pierre Laplace, to Napoleon on why his works on celestial mechanics make no mention of God.
The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
--Mark Twain
The truth is more important than the facts.
--Frank Lloyd Wright
I may not be much of a babysitter, but I know that if you pour a bunch of sand into a kids mouth it will shut them up
for a while.
What if there isn't a tommorrow, there wasn't one today.
--Bill Murray, on the movie Groundhog's day when it begins to be Groundhog's day every day
Voting for me doesn't make me section leader!
--Sam Holmes after complaining about not getting section leader and I told him I voted for him.
I bet I could kill a guy with my toes.
--Stormy, Sealb 2021
Oh your god!
--Bender, Futurama
The last tile. If we had started with this one we would've been done alot sooner.
--Ira Quin, some show on HGTV
Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights.
--Cornell Veasey. If you take offense to that, complain to him at
nataku_333@yahoo.com He told me to put that up
Oh, so that means they're equal?
--Mrs. Adams when Kevin was talking about isoceles triangles and marking the legs congruent
I may be fat, but you're ugly, and I can diet.
The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.
Just because it's in print, doesn't mean it's the gospel.
--Micheal Jackson
